Mom in a Minivan

Dear Mom in the minivan with scratches and dents on your bumper who cut me off this morning,

If you could so kindly pay attention to the road you are driving on and stop looking in the mirror we would all appreciate it. Yes, I realize you needed to fix your mascara. Yes, I know you were brushing your hair while at the stop sign and of course could not drive with only half your head looking beautiful. Yes, I realize that your phone was ringing so of course you had to let go of the steering wheel and rumage through your pocket book to find it before the oh so important caller hung up. I understand you did not mean to cross over the yellow line more than twice while I was driving behind you. I am sure those frightened people on the other side had a clean pair of underwear handy to change into when they arrived at their destination. I am thinking (with all the scratches and dents in your car) that this was not your first time swerving all over the road. I am also thinking you should probably focus on driving more and multi-tasking less. You are not very good at it.

Sincerely,
A Quiche Woman